Home has never felt so far away till now.
Being in Peru means that I’m the closest to home I’ll ever be on the race. According to the map, that is.
I was recently sick to the point of being hospitalized. When it comes to being sick, the only thing I want is to be wrapped in blankets, watching TV, with my mum. Home.
As I laid in the hospital bed, the home I wanted was the place I’d grown up in, surrounded by the warmth and love of the one who grew me into who I am today. When I was driving away from the hospital to the hostel, the home I wanted was the windows-down, music-loud drive to Chick-fil-A. As I sit here now, back in a hospital room for the sake of my teammate Tori, I want home for her. Whatever that may be, I’m craving it.
Being away from home for 4 months is making me realize that home is a self-created atmosphere. Normally when I say I’m “homesick,” I’m not thinking of the house I grew up in. I’m thinking of my family, my best friends, and the experiences I’ve lived. These people were my choice to love and live life with; I chose to make them my home. Right now, I’m at a different place of life. I’m creating memories and moments in places with people I never imagined.
It’s my choice whether or not I choose to make my here my home.
If you were to ask me what the hardest part of the race is, that would be my answer. The Lord is reminding me of the fact that my body is His temple, the best kind of home there is. Wherever He leads, that’s where I’m to be. And THAT is home. Creating home where I’m at requires effort and digging into what He’s harvesting there. And right now, that’s a hospital room in Cusco, Peru. The Lord is wild in His ways, that’s for sure.
I joked around with my friends before I left that I would start missing them 6 months into the race. Well, here I am, 4 months along, and I haven’t gone a day without thinking about each of you. I miss you, but no worries, I’m creating home here. I’ll be in Cincy to create more home with each of you sooner than we think.
Please keep Tori in your prayers as she recovers from salmonella and a parasite. She’s a fighter, and really just wants to get out of the hospital! I’d like to thank each of you for getting me this far and pushing me out of my comfort zone. Thank you for being a form of home for me; I love living life with each of you.
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Here’s what I’ve been listening to!
“Like Real People Do” by Hozier
“Worthy of it All” by Lauren Alexandria
…and the soundtrack to “The Greatest Showman!”
What a mature way of looking at home. It is wherever you are. What is very special you haven’t forgotten us. Now I have a big smile on my face. You sound truly happy. We wouldn’t want you any other way. Love you soooo much!! Mama
Oh, Bernadette………so happy to hear from you and know that you are feeling better!!! With God all things are possible! Especially knowing how much you are loved and how much we care about you!!! Soon you will have a “new” home to love and fill with the shining star of Jesus that you are!!! Sending our love and hugs!!! “Grandma” Pat
Thanks for sharing your heart. This blog truly ministered to me as our family has been in a season of moving and transition since last summer. Love this insight – “Creating home where I’m at requires effort and digging into what He’s harvesting there.” I needed to hear that today. Thank you!
How terribly difficult for you! As you thought of “home”, I thought of brining “home” to you, or even to bring you “home”. Yet, I know how important it was and is that your home, your dwelling place be made in Him. How lovely It is and He is. And His beautiful Spirit will continue to cover you.
Love you
I’m so happy to hear you’re feeling better!! And I love how you’ve had to redefine home. Looking at what it meant in your comfort zone and looking at what God wants you to think of home. So insightful!! Thank you for making us think that way. Because I’ll tell you – I’m a homebody!! Now I might need to be more open to “home”. Hug and prayers for you and your teammates!
Glad to hear you’re ok! Praying for Tori. I’m glad to hear that you’re learning so much from the Lord and glad to hear you share about it!
Love you,
Nick
So glad you are better, out of the hospital and regaining your strength. Praying for Tori and the rest of your team. I loved your words on “Home”. I have learned throughout this last year a similar lesson. Home is not the house we built 12 years ago, the actual structure, but it is all the people that have entered through the door, the memories we have made, the love that we have shared, the struggles we have overcome. The house has been sold, we downsized, but I still have a “Home” We make “Home” right where God leads us to be! That home brings us so much joy, love and peace. Love you bunches!
Love you Bernadette and I’ve been praying for you and your Mom. I’ll pray for Tori too! Thanks for sharing your journey with us and the things God is teaching you. Way to stay the course. So proud of you!
Once again, beautiful words from a beautiful girl! I love your vision of “home”! My heart is reaching out to you and giving you a big hug! Stay strong and trust God in everything. I’m praying for you, Tori and your team/squad. Love you!
Thank you so so much for your ever so sweet words!!!
Mrs. Hyde, thank you so much for your encouragement. This really made my heart smile! I’m praying now for your family in this season of change.
I can hear your voice saying that Mr. Doug, and I feel so loved! Thank you for being a constant support to me on this journey. The Lord is steadfast and good!
Isn’t home just a crazy thing to think about?! It’s wild! Thank you for being so open about where you’re at with this, trust me I know where you’re coming from! I love hearing about where you’re at~ sending hugs to you!!
Mannnnn I tell you WHAT. God sure knows how to bring Heaven down, lol. I love you and am praying hard for you in this journey!
Love and hugs to you, my love!
Amennnnnn, Mrs. Whaley! I LOVE what you have to say here about the structure itself. Hearing your heart as well as Harper’s on this topic is so encouraging to me. I see you building home wherever you are led, and I love this! I’m sending hugs your way!!
It’s so so sweet to read your words, Miss Dana! Thank you for supporting me in everything; I am beyond blessed to have you apart of my life!
I truly TRULY am, Mama! The Lord is so good and loving towards me 🙂 Thank you for supporting me in this, I am SO thankful for you!! Love you!!
I truly TRULY am, Mama! The Lord is so good and loving towards me 🙂 Thank you for supporting me in this, I am SO thankful for you!! Love you!!
Gosh, you are too sweet! Thank you so much for your support in love and prayer, I appreciate it so greatly 🙂 Love you and sending hugs your way!
Hey Sweetie… how beautiful is this!!! Not that you were feeling ill in the hospital, lol, but what God did with the time you were there! How HE is framing what ‘home’ is… I love your words– “The Lord is reminding me of the fact that my body is His temple, the best kind of home there is. Wherever He leads, that’s where I’m to be. And THAT is home.” Love, love, love this!!! I am so blessed to have lived with you in a house…. and I love the ‘home’ we have created and continue to create! Love you so so so very much!!! xoxoxox
I am SO BEYOND thankful for the home I have with you, mum!! You and I are a team that fights hard together, I’m so glad we have built such a safe and beautiful home 🙂 I love you so much and can’t wait to hug you soon!! xoxox